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WRITE FOR TITTY BISCUITS
I'm in the business of making dreams come true. If you grew up dreaming of writing for a two-bit comedy site for very little money while the author is too busy with his super-interesting real life stuff to do it himself, read on!

 

There's two opportunities currently open if you want to write for the site - feature writing and fiction submissions. Here's the skinny on both gigs:

 

Fiction Writing for the Unholy Biscuit

A long time back, about five years ago, I finished up a series of ezines for which I edited. After the embarrassingly-long hiatus, and a lot of deliberation, I've decided to fire up the Unholy Biscuit for at least one more issue.

I do a lot of writing and editing for my day job so I'm lucky enough to get my creative fill between 9 to 5 every day. However, the reason I miss the ezine is because I get sick of my own voice and writing style quite often so it's great to read stuff from other people. It also helped me meet a bunch of great (and sometimes creepy) people over the Interwebz, and despite it being half a decade since the last issue I still keep in touch with them. Especially the creepy ones.

So, the call out is for new submissions. As you can see if you flick through the archive, I am very relaxed with the restrictions on genre, style and content so long as it is excellent writing. However, please note that this time around I'm not taking poetry - I was never very good at judging or editing poetry so your work would be wasted on me.

Also note that although I'm using the term 'fiction' very loosely too (by 'loosely' I mean 'disregarding the entire definition of the word'). I don't want a biography of your Grandma's golden years, but if you have a good story which is written in first person and is happens to be about you, I'm not going to split hairs. Was The Dice Man fiction or non-fiction? I don't care, it was good.

Email me on zeke@tittybiscuits.com for full details and tell me a bit about yourself before sending me work. Pay is around 15 per accepted short.

Feature Writing for Titty Biscuits

This I'm a little more hazy on. All I know at this stage is that it'd be great to get more features for the main part of the site, the kind of which you can see on the homepage.

It could be a great written anecdote, some kind of graphical thing, a video, an ebook, column series - heck, I don't mind. However it's worth mentioning that one of the main reasons I don't update more often is that although I write a lot of stuff myself, I rarely think it's of good enough standard to put online (there's enough self-important drivel cluttering up the place as it is).

I also prefer to keep the features at least semi-comedic, since I keep calling this a comedy site even though that aspect gets diluted often with other non-humour projects.

But if you think you've got an idea which would pass muster (maybe you need help bringing it into fruition?) then we should talk. As always I don't expect to have your unique content for free, so we can chat about that too if it's something I'm interested in. Usual email address applies:
zeke@tittybiscuits.com

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